Welcome to the Chaos

You have stumbled upon the new blog (i.e. random babblings) of a quirky single mom. A shoot-from-the-hip, anti-pink (yet almost gaggingly perky), non-traditional, can cuss like a sailor but loves insanely and has the save the world syndrome gal who is bracing for a future as a Crazy Cat Lady though she secretly hopes like hell it doesn't come true. Enjoy your stay and feel free to say hi- I don't bite. Well, unless we're dating and you are into that type of thing or you contain peanut butter. >;-)

About Me

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Quirky single mom of two monkeys. I used to beat up the kids that picked on the "special students" during recess. Now I work with those with chronic mental illness. I speak quite a few languages, enjoy coed naked underwater basket weaving, have an addiction to Sushi and humor is my defense mechanism. Arrogant people make my right eye twitch. I'm ambidextrously brained, I will knit for tattoos, I am the friend that everyone comes to for advice and bail money. I pride myself on keeping my eyes, ears, heart and mind open. Making me laugh goes a long way with me, I think the brain is the sexiest organ and I'm the kinda gal you can take anywhere and I'll have a good time. Other than that, I'm just me.

Followers

“Hey Sid, What Would Nancy Think?”

After weeding through an inbox full of insanity on freaksneedlovetoo.com, I actually got one that had some potential. There was a charming awkwardness about his first message. His profile was kind of plain, but there was a tint of hope with the fact that a. he was a single dad (which helps in understanding what goes along w/ the joys of dating moi) and b. he was a geek (in case I haven’t made it clear- geek is WAY HOT to me). So, I pursued back. We e-mailed back and forth for about a week and then actually talked on the phone. It was going really well. Some kick ass commonalities. No obvious red flags of insanity. No attempts at phone sex right off the bat. Stable job. Heard him with is kids and sounded like a really good dad. I’m thinking – “Wow. This might be easier than I thought.” Silly, silly me.

So, after two weeks of talking and such, we finally get to set up an actual date. Oh, and score another big point for him being a huge fan of sushi as well! Yup, a man that wants to take me out for sushi. Day of the date rolls around… a Saturday night. I’m really nervous cuz that’s how I get when I like someone. Total Über Dork Girlie in full effect. Seriously, I know it’s going to fully shock you, but I do get totally shy when it comes to someone I like. I girlied up. Well girlie for me. Yup, a hint of the one hair product I own and actual eyeshadow. I was gussssied.

He arrives. With a dozen roses. Swooon! Ok, I know roses are cliché and if you truly know me, I would dig tulips or daisies more, but omg, total A for effort. Another bonus- I’ll admit, he’s way cuter in person than his pictures. The ride to the sushi restaurant was like two 16 year olds driving on their first date. Both goofy grinning and trying to think of conversation. Eventually, it came though and he started to relax. Me, not so much.

We sit, we chat about what to order. I stay away from any alcohol as I’m the world’s cheapest date so, yeah, not a good idea. No matter how much I’m thinking it would sedate the butterflies. Waitress takes the order and we slip into more comfortable chit chat. Silly stuff, music (I inflicted Puscifer on him and turns out we were both at the same Beastie Boys concert at the same time), TV (we both actually watch Hell’s Kitchen). Food comes, we dig in. Doing good so far…

Talk of TV shows continues as I mention I rarely watch TV. Then he asks “Have you ever watched the show ‘Intervention’?” I’ve got a sushi and woo hoo this date is going good kind of buzz so my brain isn’t processing quite as quickly as it normally does. I respond “I’ve seen a couple of episodes and thought it was pretty good. Sad, but they mean well.” Then it comes…

“I’m going to be on it.” * CHOKE * I feebly attempt a recover and blame it on a chunk of wasabi. “Really, you are?” Him: “Yeah, they were out like two weeks ago to film.” I’m doing math in my head and even w/ a sushi high, I know that’s right when we started talking. Me (trying not to panic yet): “ Wow. So.. umm..were you one of the interventers?” I’m thinking “Fuct if I care that’s not a word and please say yes.” He laughs. “Oh my gosh, yeah. Ha ha no, I wouldn’t be here if I was the main subject.” * HUGE SIGH OF RELIEF* Me: “* giggle* Yeah, I guess not. Well, unless it was vastly unsuccessful, but that doesn’t make for good TV. So, was it one of your friends?” Him: “No, it was for the kids’ mom.” * instant stomach knot * He continues: “It was really crazy. They came out to the house and interviewed us and then took her off to a rehab in Florida. So, she’s there now until she finishes detox.” * gulp * * head spinning * Me: “W O W. Um.. then what?” He’s missing my meaning of then what and replies “Then they come back and shoot some follow up footage. It’s not gonna air until Fall. I’ll totally let you know when it’s on. Oh! Maybe we can watch it together!” I close my eyes, count to ten in Japanese (seemed fitting) and shake my head like an Etch a Sketch in an attempt to clear it. * deep breath * Me: “So, was she living with you at the time they came to film this?” Him: “Yeah. We’ve been off and on again for years. But, I’m thinking this time is the last straw.” Me, just being me at this point, “So Sid, does Nancy know you’re on a date now?” Him: “ Hiuh?”

Waitress, I'll have that drink now.. Jack & diet and oh.. make it a double. PLEASE.

Yup…who knew I’d meet me a celebrity? Damn right I’ll post the link for the episode when it airs. We can pop some corn and watch the train wreck together. Good times.

7 comments:

The Absence of Alternatives said...

Cross your heart and say you will POST THE LINK!

UberDorkGirlie said...

Oh hells yeah I'm posting it!! Cross my heart & stuffs! I may even have a viewing party the night that bad boy airs! >;-)

alexkeller said...

ugh - i can't wait until you post the link. i have never watched that show but i will!

Sugar said...

Never saw that coming. Wow... So are you gonna see him again? hahaha

JoolzGirl said...

HO-LEE-CRAP! I just stumbled across your blog - so as a first post to read, this one was killer. I shall be back to read some more. Please do post the link.

Jenn And The City said...

I just found you too - where have you been all my life! Your posts are great. As for on-line dating, been there, done that, can't say I ever found me a celebrity like that though....

UberDorkGirlie said...

Welcome aboard the crazy train :) Oh yes, I promise, link will be posted and broadcast. I'm tellin ya, we can all pop some corn and watch it together. Of course I'll be chasing my popcorn w/ a Jack & diet... >;-)

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