Welcome to the Chaos

You have stumbled upon the new blog (i.e. random babblings) of a quirky single mom. A shoot-from-the-hip, anti-pink (yet almost gaggingly perky), non-traditional, can cuss like a sailor but loves insanely and has the save the world syndrome gal who is bracing for a future as a Crazy Cat Lady though she secretly hopes like hell it doesn't come true. Enjoy your stay and feel free to say hi- I don't bite. Well, unless we're dating and you are into that type of thing or you contain peanut butter. >;-)

About Me

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Quirky single mom of two monkeys. I used to beat up the kids that picked on the "special students" during recess. Now I work with those with chronic mental illness. I speak quite a few languages, enjoy coed naked underwater basket weaving, have an addiction to Sushi and humor is my defense mechanism. Arrogant people make my right eye twitch. I'm ambidextrously brained, I will knit for tattoos, I am the friend that everyone comes to for advice and bail money. I pride myself on keeping my eyes, ears, heart and mind open. Making me laugh goes a long way with me, I think the brain is the sexiest organ and I'm the kinda gal you can take anywhere and I'll have a good time. Other than that, I'm just me.


Let's Start With Stupid People And Leave The Gays And Vajajays Alone

Dear Politicians,

If you would please sit down, shut the Hell up, and listen for one tiny moment, I would appreciate it. I understand you want to hold firm on declaring war on the right for EVERYONE to marry. I understand you are further wadded up over my vajayjay and what I do or do not do with it. Let’s just be honest for a moment… gay marriage has never killed anyone nor has my vajayjay.

What we need to focus on is a much more dangerous killer… stupid people

They are everywhere.

Instead of telling me what I can and can’t put in my hoo hoo and how I can or can’t protect it , instead of telling me and those I love who we all can and can’t marry, let’s start truly saving the world.

You can begin with making a decent IQ required along with passing the drivers test. Stupid drivers kill people EVERY day.

You know who else does? Entitled people. People that feel where they are going is far more important than anyone else.

Combine the two together and it’s lethal.

For example, the 70 year old lady that almost hit me today whipping through a stop sign so she could pull into the last open handicapped spot in the parking lot. I literally had to jump out of the way, yet she had the nerve to get out of her car and scream “next time you get in my way, I’ll hit you!”

These people are in charge of a giant moving weapon. And that is just fine in your eyes.

Yet vajayjays and gay marriage are somehow worth wasting hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of political bullshit on?

I’m gonna set the little old crabby granny who could be in the Death Proof sequel loose in your neighbor hood with her safe vajajay and her straight husband and see if you don’t maybe come to see eye-to-eye with me.

Look out for the stop signs.



NakedHobo said...

Preach sister preach! Amen!

Robert Headley said...

She actually said that? That's absurd!

UberDorkGirlie said...

Hee hee I'm preachin! :) And yes, Robert, she did. She is quite absurd. Sadly, absurd people are everywhere too. She is also lucky I didn't have the girls with me. If she would have almost hit them, there would have been bail money involved.

David Stein said...

Awesome! You have my vote.

CodeVictim said...

Stupid people has become an epidemic, many are unable to Google the meaning to know if they are part of the epidemic.

I comment on this now seeing how I am doing my best to make sure it isn't contagious.

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